Peruse Bible teachings and church happenings
“The Pasture Or the Prison”
Categories: Bible, Church relationships, marriage & family, Sunday Family Report articles, wisdomThere are two ways to create a sense of security in relationships
The first is by control; always watching closely for things to go wrong and doing all things possible to prevent problems. These relationships require tight boundaries, frequent questioning, stern lecturing, and at least a few emotional walls to prevent us from getting wounded. The best metaphor for this kind of atmosphere is a prison—a place with maximum security but with minimal freedom.
The second way to create security in a relationship, however, is by trust; believing that each party will do what’s best and knowing that difficulties can be met with truthfulness, confidence, and peacemaking efforts. These relationships require selflessness and humility, affirmations of trust, and questions asked for information rather than for accusation. The best metaphor for this kind of atmosphere is a pasture—a place with security is accepted as a gift; where all parties accept the risk of problems because they are sure those problems can be overcome; where all parties enjoy great freedom.
As parents, as bosses, as spouses, as teachers, as church leaders, as mentors, as friends… we all have the potential to foster both kinds of relationships. We can let the people around live in a pasture or a prison. Both will create their own type of security, but only one is like the relationships that God wants to bless us with: those which are led by still waters, which fear no evil even when they walk thru the valley of the shadow of death, and which are peaceful enough to lie down in green pastures (Ps. 23). That is God’s gift to us, if we’ll receive it. Is it the gift that we’re giving to others?
- Dan Lankford, minister
